Within you lies a burning chasm, the gap between what you know and what you want to know. Whether it is how to bring love into your life, what you need to do to take the next step at work or how to convert pints to liters.
Consulting a psychic can be like grabbing a step ladder to see over a fence to look for the answer. You get a little boost up to see over the top, but you don’t get drone access to the entire neighborhood.
Before you pick up the phone to book a reading or email your go-to advisor, consider whether this is a good move or if it is time to chill the eff out.
1. To ask when he/she will call
While some psychics do have a knack for predicting times and dates of events with astonishing accuracy, most have no idea. Time is a completely arbitrary and made up concept. As humans, we use it to help maintain a standard and sense of organization. The Spirit World does not function on human time. Even if your psychic is able to give you a time frame, it is completely subject to change the second it comes out of your reader’s mouth. You have free will. She has free will. She might have a nudge to call you and ignore it. Wait it out, you’ll know soon enough.
2. To find out if you are pregnant
Unless your psychic is a medical doctor, asking this is a really touchy area. Most psychics, even if they have an answer one way or another will be hesitant to answer your question. There’s a little thing called liability. They tell you one thing, cause you to spend hundreds on a doctor’s visit for nothing, and then you want to go on People’s Court to try to get your money back. Just wait. Very much like the phone call, you’ll know at some point, most likely within two weeks.
3. To ask yes/no questions
In a rare instance, your psychic will have a clear cut yes/no answer for you. Our world works more in the grey area, in between yes and no than either polarity. Will he come back to me? Uh….when? In this lifetime, in another lifetime? Oh, this lifetime. He may come back, if… See? Yes or no questions are pretty hard to pin down. That prankster, free will, plays into every facet of our lives that may cause for murky answers. Not only will your psychic be unable to provide a definitive yes or no, your Magic 8 Ball isn’t even sure.
4. When you’ve seen 5 others and keep asking the same questions
Maybe you have a go-to psychic advisor. Maybe you choose blindly or based on a referral. You’ve gone to one psychic, didn’t like or understand your reading, so you go to a different one for another reading. The funny thing is that they both told you the same basic message, there were some extra details sprinkled into each. You figure that you better try again just in case they were both mixed up. Same information. You are still completely adamant that he is your soul mate. You just know it in your gut. All three readers have told you that he’s cheating on you, but you just checked his phone this morning. The fourth one confirms that he isn’t your soul mate but tells you about someone else coming into your life. The fifth one…wait, why are you still paying other people to tell you what you already know? You’re checking his phone. You check all his social media on the regular. You watch him type his passcode and wonder why it changes each week. You know the answer, you just aren’t ready to admit it. Pay attention the first time and listen to your gut.
5. When you’re scared the psychic will tell you something “bad”
For starters what does “bad” even mean? Bad to one person is a parent dying, bad to someone else is going in the rain without an umbrella. Bad is pretty relative. You can rest assured that your reading is not likely to be full of gloom and doom. You’re signing up to receive someone else’s undivided attention, focused on providing you with information to help you. Telling you that your mom is going to die, even if the psychic knows this is going to happen, is not likely to help you. Psychics have professional filters and know what you can handle and what you cannot. They read energy, professionally. They are pretty good at determining what is going to be too much for you to handle.
6. When the reader tells you to book another reading, a longer reading, or to pay more to have a curse removed
Your reader is full of crap and taking your money. There are documented cases of psychics extorting clients for hundreds of thousands of dollars. Although extortion is not covered in the “Book of Ethics” that doesn’t exist, no one actually requires that amount of money to help you. You aren’t cursed and you don’t have a demonic entity preventing you from finding love or making money, most of the time. You’re getting a reading from a con artist instilling fear to make a buck. I’m not talking the fear and chokey feeling you have when you’re informed that you ex is not coming back or going to be your life partner. I’m talking the: something-is-wrong-with-you-keep-paying me-to-help-you fear that you didn’t have until your reading started. Run.
7. When you want to know what your ex is doing
Psychics are not spies. An advisor is not in the business of buying and selling information to outside sources. Frankly, what your ex is doing is none of your business. You think you want to hear that Kelly is with Dylan at the Peach Pit. In reality, you don’t. Yes, you’ve paid for a service, but a trusted reader will provide you information regarding matters that involve, you guessed it, you. Mind your business and keep moving forward. And for the love of all things sacred, do NOT drive by the Peach Pit!
8. When you want to know if you’re the baby Daddy or who your baby Daddy is
Contrary to popular belief, your psychic doesn’t know everything. If you have confusion regarding paternity issues, you’re not likely to find resolution with your psychic. Maybe on Maury, but not in a reading. Your money would be better spent on any method of birth control, rather than paying to ask a psychic this question.
9. When you want the lotto numbers
If your psychic had the lotto numbers, would he really be doing readings? Probably not, unless you also live in a glass bottom house in Tahiti. Psychics can’t access certain types of information, this is one of those things. And, they’ve all heard the “joke” when they ask if you have any questions and you ask for the lotto numbers. A million times.
10. When you just want to chat
Do you call your hair dresser to chat? Your doctor? Your lawyer? Your accountant? No, please save chatting for your friends. Your psychic wants to help you with providing insight and information and shining the light on areas you may not be able to see. Your psychic is a paid professional and doesn’t expect to get random messages or calls from you asking how her day has been. Respect the boundary!